The opening sentence to any written statement, should in my eyes, be bold.
The title of an open statement should be even bolder.
What is parental control!?
What’s the first thought that springs to mind!? Be honest?!
Mine is the settings on anything electronic. We have already parental controls set on nearly every electronic device in the house. I don’t think it’s because we don’t trust Magoo, as we do, but I think it’s because we want to protect him.
When I was a child, no such things were needed, as those electronic devices, didn’t really exist. The closet we has, was the TV, the VHS recorder, and a microwave, which was fucking massive!
I got my first games console when I was around 8. A Nintendo NES, you know, the real, original one! The internet wasn’t a thing then, so on-line gaming wasn’t an issue or worry.
But parental control. Then it was about a parent, actually being in control of their own flesh and blood, not worrying about what the were doing in cyber space, playing a blue haired alien, with 5 arms and 9 guns.
Parental control, has over the years, changed.
Years ago it meant that, being the parent, in control of ones child.
Making sure, as an adult, that your child was safe, out of harms way, and knew right from wrong. I was always taught from a very young age, that if questions were never asked, how were you supposed to find out the answers.
We tell Magoo this. If there is anything he is unsure about, to ask either one, or both of us. If we don’t know the answer, we can always find it out together.
My dad had a very big influence on me knowing random things. As a young child he was a tool setter, and a tool-maker. He is, with out, the most technical, and hands on man I know. His dad was the same, but also an expert carpenter. So anything that popped up, someone always knew what to do, or how to solve it.
But I see, day-to-day, children being told to be quiet, or shut up, when really, they are asking ‘why’ or ‘how’ for a reason. Does this mean this is what happened to their parents, and so they are doing it to their own children?! I honestly don’t know.
But back to parental control. A friend told me years ago, in the middle of a conversation about teaching small children controlled crying, that she couldn’t bring herself, personally, to do controlled crying with her then only child. The next words have always stuck in my head: You make them ( the children ), so you are responsible for them.
Every major decision since, those words have bounced into my brain.
Do adults, parents, still teach their own children manners? To hold open a door, for anyone and let them go through first? Or hold it open if the next person is near by?
What about public transport?
To give up their seat, for the elderly, or in need?
I was taught those and more, as a child, and when the scenario’s happen, Magoo is being taught them as well.
Again, it’s our responsibility as parents!
But as parents, adults, people who are sensible, it’s also our parental responsibility, and in our control, to let them have a little bit of a childhood, be kids, and be little people.
Parental control doesn’t mean you keep them on a tight lease, orchestrate every single aspect of their little lives. They do have to live a little, albeit safely.
When I was a child, parents didn’t pick or fuss with their kids, as much as they do now. We were able to do a bit more in the world. And yes, i know the world has changed a lot in the 30 odd years since I was a small child, but still.
I don’t know if parents have changed. Maybe some parents didn’t have a happy, or carefree childhood, so think their own children can’t, or shouldn’t. Or are some parents living through their children, like re-living their childhood, youth, in some messed up mid-life crisis?
I don’t know.
That to me, is not what parental control is about, but maybe it is to others.
I know that some of you may or may not read this, and think it’s about you, your style of parenting, or describing you as an adult. If it is, I’m sorry you feel that way and there is nothing I, personally, can do to help alleviate those vain, self-centred feelings you harbour inside.
The last time I mentioned anything with the word parent in it, it was like i had spoken the ‘taboo’ word, of a lost generation.
These are just my views.
Parental control always pop’s up from time to time. So I thought I’d waffle on for a little bit!